Couples counselling with me can be for married and partnered couples as well as siblings, parents and adult children.
I think of the two people arriving for couples therapy as a single relationship unit. Both parties contributing to the problems they are experiencing - even if unaware - and both people are suffering in some way.
As married/partnered individuals we bring our upbringing into relationships. This may manifest as incredulity that your partner behaves in a particular way which is different to you. Power and control dynamics are likely to be in the mix too. Many relationships are built on tensions including rivalry, jealousy, love and attachment. When you understand your particular relational cocktail, address grievances, and own your own part of the relational dynamic, you may value each other as separate people who are choosing to be in a relationship because it feels good - even if it is not perfect.
You may want couples counselling if you are experiencing:
- e.g. illness, accident, an affair, job change;
- e.g. finances, sexual intimacy, family and friendship relationships
- e.g. new baby, children leaving home, retirement; parental care;
- preventing you for listening and hearing each other.
In couples counselling you have the opportunity to explore your concerns and how you relate to each other. By concentrating on your relationship, what works and what doesn't, you can identify patterns and begin to negotiate to find solutions that are satisfactory to you both.
With my skills and experiences I offer you the space to step back, reflect, change, or not, as you agree between yourselves. I don't offer advice, but I will share my thoughts and observations for you to consider.
Please contact me to discuss how I can help you further.